Girl Meets Heart
by constancemarina24
Summary: Set a week after Girl Meets New Year Riley is fighting with her heart and mind but is finally ready to ask her parents for help. With Lucas, Maya, and Farkle all lost in their own thoughts and with these new feelings growing stronger will Riley ever have the courage confront her friends?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Riley Matthews had never thought much about dating. If she were being completely honest she had always thought the only people she would ever need in her life were Auggie, her parents, Maya, and Farkle with the occasional relative and odd friend to balance it all out. Riley figured the best kind of people in her life was meant to be shared. She shared Maya with everyone including her father and the same went for Farkle. She and Maya also shared Farkle's love and neither battled to be the sole love interest of the genius. But when Lucas came into her life, or more precisely when Maya made Riley tumble and fall onto Lucas's lap, she began to doubt that everything in her life had to be shared. Even when Zay, Charlie, and Isadora came into the picture she couldn't help shaking the idea that maybe there was such a thing as not wanting or needing to share someone with the rest of her family and friends.

Feelings were new and at first Riley depended on Maya for guidance but after what happened in Texas – after Maya admitted that she liked Lucas and Riley fought to convince herself that she could let Maya be happy with Lucas – she didn't know if she should tell anyone about how she felt. Farkle had ruined everything when he decided to open his mouth and tell everyone at her New Year's party that she still loved Lucas.

This is why she'd been holed up in her room for the last week trying to find the best way to fix everything and crying over how heartbroken Lucas and Maya looked. This is exactly why she had wanted to keep everything under wraps. She knew that if everyone knew how she felt there would be so many questions and torn relationships that things would always be a little less than perfect.

A knock at her door drew Riley out of her thoughts and she watched with swollen eyes as her mom came into the room and sat at the edge of her bed.

"Hi sweetheart," Topanga looked at her daughter and gave an empathetic smile, "how're you holding up?"

"I'm fine," Riley choked out by reflex trying to quickly dash a stray tear out of her mother's eagle eyes, "I'm just…" Riley made a gurgling noise at the back of her throat and covered her face with her hair as she tried not to burst into tears.

"Oh Riley," Topanga whispered as she reached out and gently squeezed her daughter's trembling hands. "Talk to me. Your father is worried sick and Auggie has cancelled at least four dates with Ava because he's worried you ate snow again like when you were ten. Remember how you almost got pneumonia because you were shoveling snow into your mouth and then making snow angels in your tutu?" Topanga smiled earnestly as she heard Riley giggle from behind her hair. "You can talk to me about anything Riley. I'm your mother but I was also a confused fourteen year old too."

"Mom," Riley sniffled as she looked up and at her mother, "how's Maya?" Her voice broke as she mentioned her best friend and shame made her tears fall in a torrent down her face.

"She's been just as bad as you," Topanga paused as she thought through her next words, "I admire the fact that you care about her so much that she's the first thing that you ask about but Riley, honey," she moved closer and cupped her daughter's face in her hands, "there's nothing wrong about thinking about yourself first. You give so much of yourself to everyone around you that you forget that the girl in the mirror is the most important. Now tell me," she settled into the spot next to Riley, "what exactly happened?"

"I messed it up," Riley yelped as she looked at the door, "it wasn't supposed to be like this. I had it all planned out. I was going to date Charlie and Maya was going to be with Lucas and even if I wasn't so happy with Charlie I would be okay with her being with him. Because she doesn't have what I grew up with I wanted to give her whatever the universe hadn't and more. But Farkle saw through it and he gave me until midnight to tell Lucas I still liked him and when I didn't he did."

Topanga nodded – Farkle had already told her this, he had also mentioned what happened in Texas and the whole brother situation – and sighed. "I'm going to tell you some stories that were edited when you were younger to keep you believing that fairytales happen at the blink of an eye." So Riley listened as her mother recanted Eric, Jack, and Rachel's story along with her own parents' love story. Everything wasn't as cookie-cutter straight as she had thought and she grew quiet. "Riley you were very brave and so sweet for stepping back for Maya but did you ever think about asking Lucas?"

"What do you mean? He cares about Maya," Riley immediately replied pulling her brows together.

"Yes he does and Farkle cares about you, Maya, and Smackle but not in the same way. Have you ever considered the idea that maybe Lucas doesn't care about Maya the same way he cares about you?" Topanga watched Riley as she slowly let the words sink in.

"No," Riley whispered quietly, "but he called Maya a blonde haired beauty and almost kissed her in Texas. They have gone on more dates than we ever did! They were voted best couple in the yearbook and when we tried to date we couldn't even act normal around each other…and…and…and….and"

"And what?" Topanga nearly yelled as Riley kept stuttering and choking.

"And he never said he didn't want to date her." And there it was. The real reason why Riley was so hesitant in believing anyone when they said that Lucas liked her and not Maya. It wasn't so much that Maya was blonde and blue eyed with a feisty rebellious attitude and a petite figure. It wasn't that she teased Lucas and was more mature and able to handle dating without acting like an utter goofball. It was the fact that Riley didn't think it would be so easy to make Lucas believe that she didn't like him. She hadn't expected him to put up so little resistance and go along with dating Maya. She hadn't expected it to hurt so much.

"Riley, oh Riley," Topanga kissed her daughter's head.

"Is it my turn?" Cory's voice was heard from the door and Topanga nodded as she left without a word. "Hi honey," he smiled at Riley carefully.

"Hi dad," Riley tried to smile but all she could do was give a tight grin that faded away faster than the sun does in a sudden thunderstorm. "Is it your turn for what? I really don't want another lesson. I get it bad things happen when you act on your feelings. I know I should have been thinking with my head. I know that I was right in putting Maya before myself and I also know that I was right in thinking that Lucas and her made a better couple than he and I ever could. The only thing that hurts me is that he didn't say anything!" Riley suddenly screamed and she began to visibly shake, "He didn't fight for me! He never told Maya he liked me more or that he liked her more. He didn't tell me how he felt. He's not how you were with mom. You always knew that you loved her and that she was the one for you. I don't know if that's true for me and Lucas. We are so young and we are so much alike and it's so hard to know what's real and what's not. I don't want to break up and not talk to him ever again. I always want him in my life and if us being friends - just being friends - is the only way to do it then we should just stay friends. Is it so bad that I don't want to lose him? Is it so bad that I can't see myself not talking to him years from now? How did you know mom was the one? Isn't friendship more important than anything else?" Riley was all out of tears at this point and she looked at her father the way a child did when the tooth fairy forgot to take their tooth but gave them money. The same guilt and desperation was in her eyes.

"Honey, Riley, you didn't give him the chance to fight for you. Every time he tried to confront you about it you always acted as if it wasn't that big of a deal. You were so focused on making sure that Maya was happy and was with him that you never gave Lucas a chance to figure out who he liked and which one he wanted to date. You confused him and Maya. Riley you know that I hate admitting that I like him but honestly he's been fighting for you all along. He asked me permission to take you on your first date. He gave you your first kiss. He got angry when you didn't automatically know that you were going to a dance together. I was there when you all played the couple's game and I could see the anger and jealousy just coming off him in waves. And Riley nobody will ever be your mom and I because we are our own people and we all have our own stories to tell. Take a chance Riley. Friendship is important but the possibility of something more shouldn't scare you."

Riley was silent as she contemplated the what her father had said. "What about Maya?"

"I think it would be smart to first talk it out with Lucas and then Maya. She might be your friend but you have both said your feelings and Lucas should have that too. But Riley if Lucas does say he likes you I suggest following your heart. Your head is what brought you into this mess."

Riley nodded and hugged Cory as she attempted to think it through. She had a long day of contemplation ahead of her.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Riley regretted what she was doing almost instantly. She stood alone at the bay window waiting for Lucas to appear. Early in the morning, around three, she had texted Lucas and asked if he was willing to have a talk with her thinking that he would most likely be too busy or angry with her to respond right away. To her shock when she woke up she found a text from him saying that he thought it was a good idea. Riley suggested meeting at five at the bay window and ever since then she has been a hurricane. She threw herself into cleaning her room and scrubbing the left over mascara and eyeliner from her cheeks and eyes. Her hair was roughly combed and thrown into a ponytail as she debated what to wear.

She eventually settled on a floral dress and wedges and kept her makeup light and natural careful when adding extra concealer to disguise the bags under her eyes. She then skidded toward the mirror and practiced smiling. She didn't want to seem too eager to see Lucas but she also didn't want to act rude and mean. She tried a small smile first - just the tips of her lips reaching out and an almost invisible crinkle of her eyes. Then she made her smile grow slightly so that a glimpse of her teeth was showing and her eyes were crinkling more as she let her tense shoulders drop slightly. Finally she gave her toothy smile and giggled as she realized how silly she looked practicing her smiling at the window and walked toward the window. Her stomach was doing somersaults as she waited for Lucas.

A knock alerted her to someone's presence and as she looked up at the window to find Farkle staring at her. She quickly unlocked the window and let Farkle slip into her room taking their respective seats before looking at each other.

"Farkle, what are you…?" Riley began to ask shaking her head in confusion.

"Lucas isn't coming today. I told him I had to fix things with you. I have to apologize for spilling your secret that you trusted me with in front of everyone. Also he thought it would be better if he set things straight with Maya before talking to you. He doesn't want you to be thinking about Maya and how she feels while talking to him." Farkle gave a half smile and looked down.

"Oh," she said quietly looking down at the floor.

"So about that apology," Farkle mumbled before squeezing Riley's arm until she looked at him, "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry that I outed you like that. I'm not apologizing for saying how you feel in front of everyone but I'm sorry that I didn't do it in a more private place. This whole week of you being locked up in your room could have been avoided if I had just said it at a different time. You know that I'm not great with feelings and am usually the first one who doesn't understand human emotion, and maybe I don't, but I do understand you. I know you Riley and I know when something is eating at you from the inside. You stop smiling and being the happy person that we all know and love so much.

But at the same time, Riley you have to understand that you're one of my best friends and that we are all trying to deal with these new feelings that come with growing up. If I see in pain do you really think that I would just leave you alone? You've always been there for me. When anyone of us is sad or we have a problem we all know that you will be there for us no matter what. I wanted to do the same for you and maybe it wasn't the best way possible but I tried.

I was tired of seeing my friends hurt. You were pulling away from us because you wanted to avoid seeing Lucas with Maya. Lucas was beginning to think that it was his entire fault that you and Maya stopped being so close and Maya was so overwhelmed with how she was feeling that she didn't know that she should have been paying attention to you."

"Farkle I get it," Riley said softly. "I get that you were worried about all of us and wanted us to be happy just like you are with Smackle and thanks for apologizing I really appreciate it. And now it's my turn. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I made you keep my secret even though it put you in a bad situation. I'm sorry that I was pulling away from you guys because of something that I caused. I'm starting to get what you meant about needing head and heart. And I think I'm going to tell Lucas everything. Do you think it's a good idea?" She bit her lip and stared at him.

"Riley it's what I've been telling you to do for the longest," Farkle smiled now bigger than before, "Lucas wants you guys to sort this out so we can hang out before school starts again next week. You're really smart Riley but sometimes you have to realize that being just smart isn't always right. I don't know if Isadora and I are going to be together forever. I don't know if tomorrow some part of me will stop feeling the way I do about her, but I do know that I'm glad I gave us a chance. Eric told you about Rachel and Jack and you're applying it to you and Lucas which I get but, look," Farkle shook his head and began to gesture wildly with his hands for emphasis as he became more confident in his lecture, "If you think Lucas is Rachel you have to realize one thing: Rachel had a crush on Eric but she never loved him. Eric had feelings for Rachel but she only ever loved Jack, and yeah it didn't work out but they had their reasons for not working.

You are not an exact copy of your dad or mom or your Uncle Eric. They made their choices and they made their world theirs. It's time we start making our world ours Riley. And no matter what happens, whether we end up all living in different countries or marrying each other or marrying people we've probably never even met, our friendships will never change."

Riley smiled at Farkle and was about to say something when he decided to add – for extra effect – a few things "Don't push away your feelings for nobody not even Maya. You can't grow if you are always wondering about how other people are feeling and if you are somehow hurting their lives. Because honestly Riley people usually don't care about other people and being considerate about others is so sweet but don't forget you need the sun just as much as other people do."

Riley didn't realize she had gotten emotional until she felt a tightening in her throat and cleared it loudly as she blinked back a few tears. Farkle had always been the brain in the group but she was usually the one who gave these kinds of heartfelt speeches. It was nice to be taken care of for a change and not immediately have to deal with someone else's problems.

"But Maya is my best friend."

"Did you know that your Uncle Josh came to visit on Tuesday?" Farkle replied, avoiding her question with a smirk.

"No," Riley frowned at the new information. Her parents and Auggie hadn't mentioned her Uncle Josh visiting from NYU. "I thought he was going to be in Philly."

"He was," Farkle nodded, "but he decided he wanted to stop by and see how we were all doing now that we are getting ready to graduate and go to high school."

"Oh," Riley nodded and grinned at her uncle's thoughtfulness still slightly confused at the change of topic, "that was nice of him. I'm sorry I missed him."

Farkle coughed into his elbow and gave Riley a knowing look that made her crinkle her nose in confusion. She felt as if she wasn't in an inside joke that would have made this all possible to understand. "It'll make sense later on I promise. I already spilled your secret and I've learned my lesson. I'll let Maya tell you the news when she's ready."

"Is she okay?" Riley asked worriedly. She knew that Maya was over her Uncle Josh but maybe Lucas had turned into Texas Lucas when he got jealous and protective of Maya…

"She's more than okay. She's great." Farkle smiled now with his teeth and laughed. "Stop worrying you're going to get gray hairs and wrinkles if you keep stressing like this."

"And Lucas isn't mad?" She inquired choosing to ignore his lighthearted joke.

"No, why would he be mad? We all love your Uncle Josh," he paused for a second before adding, "especially Maya."

Riley was about to ask him what he meant when there was a knock at her door. "Niche!" Uncle Eric screamed from the doorway and attacked Riley with a tight hug. Riley was in so much shock from the unexpected visit from her uncle that she barely responded. "Goodbye robot!" At that she turned in time to see Farkle close the window behind him.

"Hi Uncle Eric," she smiled at him confusedly. There was a part of her that was always happy to see her Uncle Eric but at the same time looking at him reminded her of her own situation and she couldn't help but try and avoid his gentle hug.

"Hello niche I have just come from talking to your mom, dad, and MY COUSIN AUGGIE!" He shouted as he looked at her with a smile and sat down in the seat where Farkle had been.

"Okay?" Riley kept looking at him and waiting for an explanation.

"And it's my turn to give you a piece of the world my young niche."


End file.
